Friday, 17 February 2012

The Art of Procrastination!

Pro. cras. ti. nate
v. pro. cras. ti. nat. ed, pro. cras. ti. nat. ing, pro. cras. ti. nates

  1. To put off doing something.
  2. To postpone or delay needlessly.
As hinted at in the title of this blog, procrastination is an art. Fact.  

As a master of procrastination myself, I intend to share some useful tips and websites in order to improve your procrastinating style.  Remember, procrastination is an individual art form and therefore as a budding procrastinator (you, perchance) one must find a way to suit ones own procrastination needs.  However, hopefully by sharing my own knowledge, I can bestow upon you some of the fundamental basics in procrastination.

1.  Prepare procrastination area.
Whether this be in the library or at home, you need to prep your surroundings.  I often choose the library as this subdues the side effects of procrastinating, mostly guilt.  If you are in the library, it means you have made the effort to leave home and procrastinate elsewhere.  You can also convince yourself that you actually did want to work, but you are tired from the journey into town and you need to unwind. 

Before actually beginning the process of procrastination, you must first make it look to all outsiders that you are actually doing some work.  Lay out pens, etc. the more stationary you have out the better it looks. Take the lids of pens for extra effect.  Open books and notepads to pages you have actually written on.  It is needless to say that the internet is the greatest and most fruitful source for procrastination, so get the laptops out!  Another handy tip is to have a Word document open; either the essay or assignment you have been working on, or, if you haven't even reached that stage yet, an old essay will do the trick.  

2.  Wikipedia it!
Wikipedia is a great way of making procrastination feel like learning!  Once you open one page, you're off!  Open extra tabs galore and come back to them.  here are some categories I have found most useful for encouraging further reading (more tabs):
  • List of extinct animals
  • Royal families (not for everyone but I love a bit of aristocratic glamour!)
  • World War 2
  • A favourite TV show (e.g. Sopranos, Boardwalk Empire, America's Next Top Model, GAme of Thrones)
  • Harry Potter
  • Lord of the Rings
Reducing the guilt tip:  Wikipedia a subject matter in your essay/assignment.  This not only provides you with very helpful resources, but also makes you feel like you may actually be doing something fundamentally appropriate.

3.  Facebook- making stalking acceptable
Lets face it, we all like a good stalk; we pretend that we do not like someone nosing around our Timeline but really it kinda means your interesting!  When blending Facebook and procrastination, the key is to set your appearance to offline and try to not go crazy with the 'like' button.  This, and only really to other procrastinators which will have to time to recognise your increased usage, will show people that you are, in fact, not working.  Stick to flicking through photos and make all comments in your head.

Reducing the guilt tip:  I am afraid I have lead you into a trap with this one; there simply is not way to make Facebook procrastination not guilt free.

4.  Take a Break.
This is a pure gold procrastination tip, especially if you take this said break with someone else.  This will make it seem like to the person who has asked you, that you are doing work in which you genuinely do need to take a long, long break from.  I recommend coffee... and cake.

Reducing the guilt tip:  Tell yourself and have your friend tell you that working with breaks is a much more productive way of working.

5.  Make a list
Perfect way to procrastinate.  Make a list of all the things you intend to do.  This way you are actually writing and you are kind of doing work, just not the work that needs to be done.  The longer and more detailed the list the more time taken up.

Reducing the guilt tip:  This is already pretty much guilt free, but to make it even less guilt ridden, put deadlines on these 'To Do''s.  Make the deadlines ridiculously lenient so when you do eventually do them, they will more than likely be done in time, thus making you feel great and proactive.

6.  Make a blog
I think this one speaks for itself...

I think/ hope I have provided you with the necessary means to get your very own form of procrastination well on its way.  From here on in I wish you only one thing...


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